Category Archives: Visual

Git Aht! – Things To Do This Weekend

(Things to do while ordering a Surge…)

Friday, January 12
Lisa Lampanelli, 8:00 p.m., Byham Theater, Dahntahn
lampanelliRude, crude, and socially unacceptable. But enough about me, let’s talk about Lisa. Known in some circles as the “female Don Rickles”, Lisa’s act delivers the strength at most of the celebrity roasts you’ve seen in the past few years. Sample from the Shatner roast: “Betty White is so old, that on her first game show ever, the grand prize was fire.” That’s the cleanest pull I could get, the rest of her act is raunchy, filthy, dirty, and many other things Bill Cosby would disapprove of. But it’s also hilarious, and well worth checking out. She’s one of the best stand-ups working today, and she’s made the move to the big rooms like the Byham. Sooner or later, she’s going to get a sitcom, because that’s what always happens, so take a look now, and be able to say “I saw her act before she sold out and ended up on KDKA Mondays at 8:30.”

Saturday, January 13

Meet The Scientist – “Insects: A Growing Invasion”, 1:00 p.m., Carnegie Museum Of Natural History, Oakland
bugslife_ladybug “When Gregor Samsa woke up one morning from unsettling dreams, he found himself changed in his bed into a monstrous vermin. His girlfriend then crushed him with a kleenex and flushed him. The End. (Roll Credits)”

See how much shorter that could’ve been? Look, I know we all had to read it, and we’re all supposed to see it as allegory for.. allegory for… Umm, I dunno, whatever, who cares. But really, who liked it? I mean, was it a “can’t put it down” read? Did you really go into school and say excitedly to your friends ” I didn’t sleep at all last night because i totally stayed up to see what happened next to Gregor!” No, of course not. It was all a plot by the United English Teachers of America to keep us from reading something really good, or at least, something with some good underline-the-good-bits scenes. They might as well have put saltpeter in the Johnny Marzetti.

What in tarnation was I talking about? Oh, right. Yeah, so the Carnegie does the “Meet The Scientist” thing, and that’s good because it helps with their socialization skills. Because if we leave these eggheads to their own devices, you know what happens? We end up with the atomic bomb, autonomous robots that will eventually kill us all (when they’re not travelling back in time to kill/save Sarah Conner), and the scourge of Lite Beer.

So please join Dr. Chen W. Young, Curator, Section of Invertebrate Zoology, as he examines some common bugs and delves into how they impact our lives, why some are pests and others are beneficial, and how the hell something that small makes that big of a stain on the wall when we squish it. I mean, it’s like a miracle or something, how that little insect has that incredible volume of guts, really.

Global Beats, 8:00 p.m., AVA Lounge, ‘Sliberty

RONALDINHO He probably won’t be there, but still…

Global Beats wants to change the world through dance. Fair enough. Janet Jackson tried the same thing with mixed results. But ok, here we go with the Brazilian Music and Brazilian People, (How many is a Brazilian?) and it’s always good. Personally, I love when the DJs take to old time Bossa Nova classics and rework them with updated beats, turning them into something new, almost like a mash up, except you can’t understand a friggin’ word ’cause it’s all in Portuguese.

AVA is adjacent to Shadow Lounge, so, y’know, if the Brazilian isn’t working for ya, then you can stroll over and see what’s doing at shadow, and then go back. And forth, like Aaliyah.

5 bucks to get in, but it’s a benefit, so consider this our “Drinking For A Cause” event of the weekend.

Social And Ballroom Dancing, 7:00 p.m., Chatham College
acdcUSA Dance has big balls, and it’s my belief that these should be held every night.

USA Dance is offering a free (with admission, so not really free as in beer) one hour lesson from 7-8, and then just dancing from 8-10:30. Channel your inner Favreau of Vaughn and go relive the craze that swept the nation 10 years ago.

Oh, ok, fine, maybe I was a bit harsh. I love the swing dancing still, and this gig will have that and more, including salsa, tango, fox trot, waltz, cha-cha, rumba, quickstep, and Viennese waltz. I don’t even know what some of those are. The Viennese waltz almost sounds like a euphemism for something incredibly dirty, as in “Dude, you know that girl from the party last night? I went back to her apartment and she totally gave me a Viennese waltz!” “Dude! Sick!” And then they high five. God, I miss college.

Sunday, January 14
Flick: The 39 Steps, 7:30 p.m., Regent Square Theater, Regent Square
chuck_bruce This month’s theme is “Classic Hitchcock”, and Pittsburgh Filmmakers brings us the 1935 tale of mistaken identity, spies, and a “cool blonde”. They say the “banter in this mystery/romance set the style for sophisticated comedies for years” and I have no choice but to believe them because how the hell do I know? I mean, I haven’t seen it because I don’t know if it has any karate in it, and karate is the hallmark of a good movie. Except for that friggin’ Chuck Norris thing with Joe Piscopo and that kid from Sealab or whatever it was. That thing stunk on ice.

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Got an event planned? Would you like a whole flock of yinzers with disposable income to show up? Let Git Aht know by sending the electronic mail to gitaht@gmail.com.

Artists Helping Artists

It is wonderful to think that artists, who are sometimes referred to as “starving”, are willing to come together to help an artist in need. Artists Helping Artists: Jacob Drake is hopefully the first in a series of benefit events in which local crafters and artisans are doing just that–coming together to help another artist.

Jacob Drake (http:www.myspace.com/jacobdrake) is an animator from Eastlake, Ohio who created “Old School Revolution,” an animation that received over 100,000 views on ifilm.com. Jacob was born with muscular dystrophy and relies on his computer not only for his art but also for other aspects of his life. Jacob’s computer was recently damaged and is unable to be repaired. This benefit is to raise funds to assist Jacob in replacing his computer so he can get back to his art.

WHAT: Artists Helping Artists: Jacob Drake, a benefit art sale featuring local artists and crafters, music by DJ Dave Bernabo, food and drink specials, and more!
WHERE: Brillobox (upstairs), 4104 Penn Ave., Pittsburgh, PA 15224
WHEN: Tuesday, February 13 – 7 pm to 11 pm
COST: $3 suggested donation

E-mail artistshelping@gmail.com for more info.
Visit http://www.disCARDS.etsy.com to preview one of the evening’s featured crafters!

Git Aht! – Things To Do This Weekend

(Things to do while packing the truck for North Carolina…)

Friday, December 29
First Friday Art Walk, 6:00 p.m., Ellsworth Avenue, Shadyside
Expose-Yourself-to-Art The Ellsworth crawl features Gallerie Chiz and their opening of “A Trip … Gilt without Guilt,” a big group show with dozens of artists working in various media. There’s also the Bella Arte gallery up there, a bunch of bars and restaurants, and the cupcake shop that gave my friend and I free cupcakes at 12:30 a.m. last Friday night as we were just walking by on the way to the car. (“CoCo’s” I think. I don’t recall for sure, because I had been drinking. Surprise.) They were delicious, a chocolate and an egg nog flavored ‘cake, and that’s as far as I’ll go into the whole “Cupcake Class” thing. That’s for them what are smarter than me to discuss.

Game Night and the Seven Minute Dance Series, 9:00 p.m., Attack Theater Studios, Garfield
Every so often throughout the night, you’ll get a seven minute dance performance by Attack Theater, so it’s like, awesome, for those of us with horrendously short attention spans. And Games? Yeah, games, like four-square, tic-tac-toe, backgammon and Atari.

combat
Atari? I will own you at Combat, especially the bouncing bullet tank game. Know this. Word.

Saturday, January 6
Learn To Row, 11:30 a.m., TRRA Training Center, Millvale
deliveranceOk, the holidays are over, and yeah, you drank and ate as much as I did. Don’t lie… You look in the mirror and you’re like “who brought Marlon Brando back from the dead and let him into my house?” So take the free class from the Three Rivers Rowing Association and learn one of the absolute best aerobic exercises around. The only pre-requisite needed is that you be “Willing to learn and have a good time”, which is, oddly enough, exactly the pre-requisite a 32-year-old woman had for me when I dated her at the age of 21. Sure she was a cradle-robber, but a lot of fun, especially when she made me repeat things until I got them right. There’s something to be said for that method of education, because I’ve never used the wrong fork at dinner since. I mean, my fork game is ridiculous.

The Chief, 8:00 p.m., O’Reilly Theater, Cultural District, Dahntahn
This is a one-man play focusing on the story of the legendary Art Rooney, Sr. portrayed by local actor Tom Adkins. It’s co-written by Rob Zellers and Gene Collier, the latter being possibly the best local writer we have, and certainly the most entertaining every time he pecks out a column for the PG. The Chief may be making its last run, so this would be a good choice for your Saturday night.

Kill Hannah, 7:00 p.m., Mr. Smalls, Millvale
Kill Hannah does have one of the best-titled songs of last year, the alt-radio hit “Lips Like Morphine” which satellite radio has been playing the hell out of and rightfully so, it’s a great single. The openers, Pink Spiders (check out the Stewart Copeland-esque drum track on the intro to “Modern Swinger” at that link) are pretty good too. They’re described as “Striking figures in pink and jet black” and are “distant and aloof, itchy and sex-fueled.” Ok, distant, aloof, sex-fueled… Muy Rock and Roll descriptors for sure, but “itchy”? Who the hell’s itchy? Or are they throwing that out there so they’ll get pelted with Desitin at their shows?

Sunday, January 7
Seussical, 2:00 p.m., Byham Theater, Cultural District, Dahntahn
horton_hears_a_whoThe weekend’s “Family” event, I’m posting it because I always loved Seuss. I always got this sort of subversive vibe from his books, even when I was a kid. it’s the same reason I preferred Bugs Bunny over, say Mickey Mouse. Also, a lot of you might have the “Cat in The Hat” hat from your rave days, and it’d probably be ok to wear it to the show, as long as you a.) remove it once the performance starts and b.) take the E out of the stash pocket before you leave the house.

Or maybe not, who knows? Might make the show more enjoyable. The thing is, you might not be able to get gallons and gallons water until intermission, so keep that in mind. Plus, the rest of the row might not want you touching them, telling them how much you love them. Surprisingly, at the Byham, this turns people off to you, and they think you’re odd. You will get to touch Security on the way out, though.
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Got an event planned? Would you like a whole flock of yinzers with disposable income to show up? Let Git Aht know by sending the electronic mail to gitaht@gmail.com.

Git Aht! – Things To Do This Weekend

(Things to do while… Okay, look, go out, but take it easy on Friday and Saturday, ’cause you need to rest up for Sunday. Pace yourself, is what I’m saying. And take a cab, fer Pete’s sake. And Everybody Else’s sake, for that matter…

One more thing… Get Drunk With Dignity.)

Friday, December 29
Exposure: Pittsburgh, 7:00 p.m., Club Havana, Shadyside
exposure The final show of the year put on by the Pittsburgh chapter of Photography sharing/Social Networking site flickr features the work of Hans Rosemond, fashion/portrait photographer, whose work usually does more than just capture the beauty of the model, it finds something that might not have been there in the first place. Rosemond has a way of working with his models that brings out more emotion than one would normally find in pictures of beautiful people. He will find ways to make you look at the person beyond their looks, beyond what may or may not be there. His use of backgrounds matched to their features (eyes, for instance) or their clothing contribute to a color palette that few photographers use, let alone exploit as he does.

But ok, enough about him, this is also about having a good time. These are art openings, basically, that are held in a bar – in this case, Club Havana on Ellsworth. People drink, they laugh, they dance to techno and trance, and sometimes pop (“Pop? What the deuce?!?” say the hipster purists…), and a good time is always had. It’s always fun to see creatives cut loose, and this would be the place to come to see that. As always, because of it’s location, you can make this a part of a mini bar crawl of your own, and the Shadyside Saloon, Elbow Room, and Harris Grill are all readily-available and handy to get to.

The Big Throwback, 10:00 p.m., Brillobox, West Bloomfield
BTB9newThe monthly funk/soul dance party with resident DJ’s J. Malls & Omar-Abdul. This is the final for the year, obviously, and they’re bringing in a special guest for the night, B-Boy & DJ, Forrest Getemgump who plies his trade with Harlem with Harlem as his home base. Or home bass. Whichever.

JBExpect this to be a good one for various reasons, not the least of which is the expected set of James Brown music, which I’m sure will be a fitting tribute to one of the best entertainers of the 20th century.. RIP James. It’ll never be as funky again. Do yourselves a favor and experience the tent-revival feel of this video, where he tears the absolute shit out of “Prisoner Of Love” and “Please Please Please” when he was at his zenith. You’ll be a better person for it, I promise. If it doesn’t give you the chills, well, there ain’t no hope for your soul. Believe that.

Saturday, December 30
Get Hip PRE New Year’s Eve Bash, 9:00 p.m., Rex Theater, Sahsside
Pittsburgh Indie label Get Hip Records (I dig) throws a huge show at the Rex, with bands, DJs, giveaways, and all for 7 bucks. A bargain at twice the price. Go out and support your local music scene. And get blasted. Both of those things.

bands making the music include The Cynics, doing an unplugged set, Mondo Topless, Rainy Day Saints, and Creatures of the Golden Dawn. You’ll also get spintasticness via Dj’s Gregg Kostelich, Sean Grogan and John Doran w/special guest Mark Jerson. Go and be blown away by the Majesty. Or so I’m told.

Sunday, December 31
Noon Year’s Eve, 11:00 a.m. (I’ll explain in a second), PPG Aquarium at the Pittsburgh Zoo
So ok, it’s called Noon Year’s Eve, and it starts at 11, but that’s ’cause it’s a countdown to noon, see? Ahhhh, I get it now. Right. You know, for kids!
They’ll have DJ’s, the kids can make noise makers (with which to make noise with) and party hats (with which to hat party with) and enjoy live performances by the Disney Dancers. They even have a special ball drop, which I’m pretty sure is like the Times Square thing, not like that time your mom finally took you to the doctor in fifth grade and he prescribed “jumping up and down on one leg for a few minutes a day and that thing’ll descend sure enough.”

First Night Pittsburgh, 6:00 p.m., Cultural District, Dahntahn
Family Friendly! So I prolly won’t be there! But still!
Anyway, the Cultural District fills up with “an eclectic showcase of live music, dance and entertainment”. This is also the debut of what they’re hoping will be a new Pittsburgh Traditionâ„¢, the raising of a lighted ball.

Hold me, I’m a-twitter.

Ok, fine, I understand. And I’m all for getting new things started, I’m just saying, I would’ve liked to have seen something a bit more original, like, I dunno, at midnight, we don’t make a left in front of oncoming traffic right when the light turns green, or perhaps something along the lines of we don’t slow the F*#@ down going into a tunnel. Or how about the school buses actually obey the traffic laws the rest of us have to, like staying out of the left lane when they’re not passing anyone on Washington Boulevard past the pseudodrome

But hey, there’s one tradition I’ll always stand behind and that’s overly-extravagant fireworks, and whaddya know! They’ve got ’em at First Night. It’s a great event, a fantastic alternative to getting blitzed. At some point, yeah, we stop doing that, usually when we can start claiming “dependents” on our taxes. So if that’s you, by all means, check out First Night Pittsburgh. Buying a button gets you into everything, I’m pretty sure, and you can pick them up at The Box Office at Theater Square or at participating Gi’nt Iggle locations.

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Got an event planned? Would you like a whole flock of yinzers with disposable income to show up? Let Git Aht know by sending the electronic mail to gitaht@gmail.com.

Make/Do

I just recieved this email from the Handmade Arcade mailing list. I am super excited about this idea because I have become a big reader of the MAKE blog, which has all sorts of good ideas on how to alter your coffee maker to operate with your old nintendo controller.

Call for Projects for Make/Do For more info.
contact: Carin Mincemoyer – carin.mincemoyer@gmail.com

Wanted: Objects or activities that exemplify the do-it-yourself spirit for an exhibit at Future Tenant titled Make/Do.
Have you turned your old VCR into an automatic cat feeder? Made your old video games into musical instruments? Then you’re who we’re looking for. We’re interested in projects that alter mass produced products to do things that the manufacturer never intended, gizmos that solve problems in ingenious ways, and homebrewed answers to needs that would send most people to the local mall.
Who: Projects or proposals welcomed from artists, tinkerers, musicians, hackers, and do-it-yourselfers of all stripes.
About Future Tenant: Future Tenant, located at 801 Liberty Avenue in downtown Pittsburgh, seeks to promote raw, innovative artistic expressions from all disciplines. You can check out the website at http://www.futuretenant.org/
Send your stuff: Send digital images, photos, slides, or proposals for projects to Carin Mincemoyer at carin.mincemoyer@gmail.com or mail to 2100 Mary Street #403, Pittsburgh, PA 15203.
The Deadline: Send materials by December 31, 2006. The exhibit will take place in March 2007.