(Things to do while… Okay, look, go out, but take it easy on Friday and Saturday, ’cause you need to rest up for Sunday. Pace yourself, is what I’m saying. And take a cab, fer Pete’s sake. And Everybody Else’s sake, for that matter…
One more thing… Get Drunk With Dignity.)
Friday, December 29
Exposure: Pittsburgh, 7:00 p.m., Club Havana, Shadyside
The final show of the year put on by the Pittsburgh chapter of Photography sharing/Social Networking site flickr features the work of Hans Rosemond, fashion/portrait photographer, whose work usually does more than just capture the beauty of the model, it finds something that might not have been there in the first place. Rosemond has a way of working with his models that brings out more emotion than one would normally find in pictures of beautiful people. 
He will find ways to make you look at the person beyond their looks, beyond what may or may not be there. His use of backgrounds matched to their features (eyes, for instance) or their clothing contribute to a color palette that few photographers use, let alone exploit as he does.
But ok, enough about him, this is also about having a good time. These are art openings, basically, that are held in a bar – in this case, Club Havana on Ellsworth. People drink, they laugh, they dance to techno and trance, and sometimes pop (“Pop? What the deuce?!?” say the hipster purists…), and a good time is always had. It’s always fun to see creatives cut loose, and this would be the place to come to see that. As always, because of it’s location, you can make this a part of a mini bar crawl of your own, and the Shadyside Saloon, Elbow Room, and Harris Grill are all readily-available and handy to get to.
The Big Throwback, 10:00 p.m., Brillobox, West Bloomfield
The monthly funk/soul dance party with resident DJ’s J. Malls & Omar-Abdul. This is the final for the year, obviously, and they’re bringing in a special guest for the night, B-Boy & DJ, Forrest Getemgump who plies his trade with Harlem with Harlem as his home base. Or home bass. Whichever.
Expect this to be a good one for various reasons, not the least of which is the expected set of James Brown music, which I’m sure will be a fitting tribute to one of the best entertainers of the 20th century.. RIP James. It’ll never be as funky again. Do yourselves a favor and experience the tent-revival feel of this video, where he tears the absolute shit out of “Prisoner Of Love” and “Please Please Please” when he was at his zenith. You’ll be a better person for it, I promise. If it doesn’t give you the chills, well, there ain’t no hope for your soul. Believe that.
Saturday, December 30
Get Hip PRE New Year’s Eve Bash, 9:00 p.m., Rex Theater, Sahsside
Pittsburgh Indie label Get Hip Records (I dig) throws a huge show at the Rex, with bands, DJs, giveaways, and all for 7 bucks. A bargain at twice the price. Go out and support your local music scene. And get blasted. Both of those things.
bands making the music include The Cynics, doing an unplugged set, Mondo Topless, Rainy Day Saints, and Creatures of the Golden Dawn. You’ll also get spintasticness via Dj’s Gregg Kostelich, Sean Grogan and John Doran w/special guest Mark Jerson. Go and be blown away by the Majesty. Or so I’m told.
Sunday, December 31
Noon Year’s Eve, 11:00 a.m. (I’ll explain in a second), PPG Aquarium at the Pittsburgh Zoo
So ok, it’s called Noon Year’s Eve, and it starts at 11, but that’s ’cause it’s a countdown to noon, see? Ahhhh, I get it now. Right. You know, for kids!
They’ll have DJ’s, the kids can make noise makers (with which to make noise with) and party hats (with which to hat party with) and enjoy live performances by the Disney Dancers. They even have a special ball drop, which I’m pretty sure is like the Times Square thing, not like that time your mom finally took you to the doctor in fifth grade and he prescribed “jumping up and down on one leg for a few minutes a day and that thing’ll descend sure enough.”
First Night Pittsburgh, 6:00 p.m., Cultural District, Dahntahn
Family Friendly! So I prolly won’t be there! But still!
Anyway, the Cultural District fills up with “an eclectic showcase of live music, dance and entertainment”. This is also the debut of what they’re hoping will be a new Pittsburgh Traditionâ„¢, the raising of a lighted ball.
Hold me, I’m a-twitter.
Ok, fine, I understand. And I’m all for getting new things started, I’m just saying, I would’ve liked to have seen something a bit more original, like, I dunno, at midnight, we don’t make a left in front of oncoming traffic right when the light turns green, or perhaps something along the lines of we don’t slow the F*#@ down going into a tunnel. Or how about the school buses actually obey the traffic laws the rest of us have to, like staying out of the left lane when they’re not passing anyone on Washington Boulevard past the pseudodrome…
But hey, there’s one tradition I’ll always stand behind and that’s overly-extravagant fireworks, and whaddya know! They’ve got ’em at First Night. It’s a great event, a fantastic alternative to getting blitzed. At some point, yeah, we stop doing that, usually when we can start claiming “dependents” on our taxes. So if that’s you, by all means, check out First Night Pittsburgh. Buying a button gets you into everything, I’m pretty sure, and you can pick them up at The Box Office at Theater Square or at participating Gi’nt Iggle locations.
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Got an event planned? Would you like a whole flock of yinzers with disposable income to show up? Let Git Aht know by sending the electronic mail to gitaht@gmail.com.
Santa go straight to the Eagle.
Despite being only a couple years old, Cefalo’s Restaurant/Night Club has this sort of 30s/40s Art Deco retro feel to it, and the Big Night Band helps to contribute to the cool vibe. A traditional big band with a horn section, they play everything from standards to Van Morrison to the Police. It’s a sort of chill evening, and the dance floor is open, so go out and cut yourself a slice of rug while downing a Singapore Sling or Rob Roy.
The Second City comedy troupe drops into the O’Reilly with a holiday-themed show sending up carols, Hanukkah, family get-togethers and more. I saw them last year doing a “regular” show and was impressed. So maybe after your experience being “guy on street” at FNI the night before, you could go see professionals doing the same-ish thing.
Pub Crawl International (whose stock is tanking, by the way, I never should have invested in them, their earnings are way under forecasts) is throwing it’s December Pub Crawl a curve ball as you’ll start at Station Square, then hop the T to bars on down the line. You end up back at Station Square, so that’s good planning. Try to keep up with the group, otherwise you’ll be drinking by yourself somewhere in the South Hills.
Tiny trains, tiny trees, tiny people. It’s just like the train set you had when you were a kid, except it puts your “Tyco Under The Tree Christmas Village With Smoking Locomotive And Real Train Whistle Sounds! set” to absolute shame because it’s friggin’ enormous and really well-crafted, with 2500 square feet of realism, and actual water in the lake. (The boats are pulled by magnets underneath the platform.) If you can’t make it today, the exhibit is open through January 19th so you have plenty of time to go and revel in your model train inadequacy.
Painter Fabrizio Gerbino gets shown at 5151 for te next month or so, and tonight’s opening reception means what? Say it with me, just like we’re on some twisted, evil version of Romper Room: “Food/Beverages provided”.
Lindsay 
The Union Project (my favorite community center/cafe) is hosting their annual holiday kick-off this Saturday, Dec 3. Just $20, which is a steal, the evening includes performances by